Movie Review Haiku

Roman J. Isreal, ESQ
Principled lawyer
Sacrificed career then soul
Goes unrewarded

Murder On The Orient Express

A graphic murder
Glamourous suspects onboard
More screen time needed

Thor: Ragnorak
Two dumb superheroes
The universe in their hands
Amusingly, it works

3 Billboards Outside Ebbings, Missouri
Dormant murder case
None then multiple suspects
No one goes unscathed

Baywatch
Lifeguard characters
Acting dumber than you’d think
Waste of my brain cells

Logan
Scariest hero
Made even guys sorta cry  
In modern Western

Justice League
So many heroes
Same standard plot, fights, ending
Should copy Marvel

Baby Driver
Action musical
Baby: good anti-hero.
Love beats all, even psychos?

Wrecking Crew (Documentary)
Session musicians
Played on half of 60’s hits
Best “band” ever

John Wick 2
Keanu, bad actor,
Plays silent, lethal hitman.
Great action movie

This next one I haven't seen yet since it doesn't come out until the 22nd but this is the Haiku review I'm hoping I will be able write:

Pitch Perfect 3

Charming first movie

Underwhelming second one

This ends with aplomb?

Random Thoughts (09-03-17)

(By Richard Goodman, 03 September 2017)

When I go to my bank to cash a check, I give them the signed check and my ID yet they still want me to present a credit card, possibly as additional identification.  Why? They have my ID- why isn't that good enough?  What if I didn't have a credit card- would I not be able to cash a check anymore?  The kicker is once my bank transaction is done, they say "Thank you for being a customer for 27 years."  That doesn't get me any special consideration AND it makes me feel really old.  Thanks for that.  I blame all the criminals and idiots for adding extra layers of documentation and red tape to my life. 

Another example- although I like that chips are being added to credit cards, the reason it is being done is because crooks made regular old magnetic strips too easy to steal.  They are why I have to insert my chip card into a reader at a grocery store and wait for it to process and then get loudly beeped at when I don't remove my card the exact second the sale is done.  I'm not really going off on a tangent because I'm angry about this, I'm just mildly annoyed and don't have anywhere to vent about this.  With the fate of the world up for grabs every day, how do life's little inconveniences get soothed? 

Stand-up comedians used to handle that for me, but now they all discuss either sex or politics.  Which can often be funny but I want some catharsis about credit card angst, cell phone culture and Taylor Swift's new songs (Shame on you Kim Kardashian and Katy Perry- Look what you made her do!).  You know, the little stuff.  Where is comedian Mitch Hedberg when I need him to make me laugh about stupid stuff?  I guess I'll have to get by with Whitney Cummings and Jim Gaffigan. 

This is what goes through my head on a Sunday afternoon when I'm sitting around listening to new albums from KMFDM and Queens Of The Stone Age, eating cashews and Toll House cookie dough, making a list about the best heist and con movies of all time, looking over my Amazon wish list for other things to listen to, and deciding if I want to see a movie in the theater and if so, which one since there were no new "big" movies released this holiday weekend, for the first time in 25 years, or stay home and watch the U.S. Open (the tennis one). Such first world problems. 

Now I have to decide if this is too stupid to post to Facebook and should go on my mostly-MIA-in-the-last-couple-years blog instead.  And if I want pizza or salad for supper, although Ben & Jerry's "One Love" banana ice cream might be in contention too.  And shrimp in some fashion.  And ciabatta rolls with cheese.    Is this cookie dough laced with something that's making me delirious?

My Entertainment Favorites In 2016

2016 Rank	Movie/Book/CD Title	Stars/Author/Band	Media Type	Delivery Method	Release Year
1	When You Reach Me	Rebecca Stead	Book	Book	2009
2	Field Guide To Awkward Silences	Alexandra Petri	Book	Book	2016
3	Murder On the Orient Express	Agatha Christie	Book	Book	1933
4	Pippi Goes On Board	Astrid Lindgren	Book	Book	1946
5	School For Sidekicks	Kelly McCullough	Book	Book	2015
6	Heist Society	Ally Carter	Book	Book	2016
7	The Pursuit	Janet Evanovich & Lee Goldberg	Book	Book	2016
8	The Scam	Janet Evanovich & Lee Goldberg	Book	Book	2015
9	Toured To Death	Hy Conrad	Book	Book	2016
10	Vanishing Games	Roger Hobbs	Book	Book	2015
11	Lullaby (Spenser Novel)	Ace Atkins	Book	Book	2013
12	Encyclopedia Brown (several titles)	David J. Sobol	Book	Book	Various
13	You're Never Weird On The Internet (Almost)	Felicia Day	Book	Book	2015
14	Bossy Pants	Tina Fey	Book	Book	2011
15	City Dog	Allison Pace	Book	Book	2008
16	Miss Peregrine's Home For Peculiar Children	Ransom Riggs	Book	Book	2016
17	Pearls Gone Wild	Diane Vallere	Book	Manuscript	2016
18	This Doesn't Happen In The Movies	Renee Pawlish	Book	Download	2013
19	Boxcar Children, The	Gertrude Chandler Warner	Book	Book	1942
20	Little Prince, The	Antoine de Saint-Exupéry	Book	Book	1943
21	Grand Theft Retro	Diane Vallere	Book	Book	2016
22	Frankenstein Makes A Sandwich	Adam Rex	Book	Book	2006
1	Batman Vs Superman Greatest Battles	Jim Lee, John Byrne, Miller	Comic	Book	2015
2	Injustice Gods Among Us Year 02 Vol 01 Hc		Comic	Book	2016
2	Injustice Gods Among Us Year 02 Vol 02 Hc		Comic	Book	2016
2	Injustice Gods Among Us Year 03 Vol 01 Hc		Comic	Book	2016
2	Injustice Gods Among Us Year 03 Vol 02 Tp		Comic	Book	2016
2	Injustice: Gods Among Us Year 01 Vol 01		Comic	Book	2015
2	Injustice: Gods Among Us Year 01 Vol 02		Comic	Book	2015
3	Rat Queens (Vol 1 & 2)	Kurtis Wiebe, Roc Upchurch	Comic	Book	2016
4	Camelot 3000	M. Barr, B. Bolland	Comic	Book	2008
5	Batman: Harley Quinn	Paula Dini,	Comic	Book	2015
6	Harley Quinn And Power Girl	Amanda Conner	Comic	Book	2015
7	Mystery Girl Vol 01 Tp		Comic	Book	2016
8	Suicide Squad (2011) Vol 01 Kicked In The Teeth Tp		Comic	Book	2016
9	Suicide Squad (2011) Vol 02 Basilisk Rising Tp		Comic	Book	2016
10	Supergirl (2005): Vol 01 The Girl Of Steel		Comic	Book	2015
11	Civil War TP	Superheroes	Comic	Book	2007
12	Civil War: Wolverine		Comic	Book	2016
13	Ant Man	Michelinie, Byrne, Perez	Comic	Book	2015
14	Harley Quinn Vol. 5: The Joker's Last Laugh	Amanda Conner and Jimmy Palmiotti	Comic	Book	2016
15	Lazarus:  Vol 03- Conclave		Comic	Book	2015
16	Lazarus:  Vol 4- Poison		Comic	Book	2015
17	Jessica Jones Alias Vol 03 TP	Bendis, Gaydos,	Comic	Book	2015
18	Jessica Jones Pulse Complete Collection	Bendis, Gaydos,	Comic	Book	2015
19	Jessica Jones: Alias- Vol. 4	Bendis, Gaydos,	Comic	Book	2016
20	Harley Quinn (2014) Vol 01 Hot In The City Tp	Amanda Connor	Comic	Book	2016
21	Harley Quinn (2014) Vol 02 Power Outage Tp	Amanda Connor	Comic	Book	2016
22	Jennifer Blood: Vol 1 & 2	Garth Ennis, etc…	Comic	Book	2012
23	Wonder Woman (2011) Vol 07 War Torn Tp		Comic	Book	2015
24	Death Sentence	Monty Nero,	Comic	Book	2014
25	Tomb Raider: Vol 03 Queen Of Serpents		Comic	Book	2015
1	Concert: Tom Jones		Concert	Theater	2016
2	Concert: Aimee Mann's Christmas Show	Aimee Mann, Liz Phair	Concert	Theater	2015
3	Concert: The Bangles		Concert	Theater	2016
4	Concert: Tiffany		Concert	Theater	2016
5	Concert: Don Henley		Concert	Theater	2016
6	Concert: The Who (50th Anniversary Tour)	The Who	Concert	Arena	2016
7	Sports: Minnesota Lynx vs. Connecticut Sun		Concert	Theater	2016
1	Convention: Awesome Con	Kevin Smith, misc Dr. Who, SHIELD people	Convention	Theater	2016
1	Little Prince, The	Bridges, McAdams	Movie	Streaming	2016
2	Revenant, The	Leo, Tom Hardy	Movie	Theater	2016
3	Rogue One: A Star Wars Story	Felicity Jones, Alan Tudyk	Movie	Theater	2016
4	Sing Street		Movie	Theater	2016
5	Batman: Assault on Arkham	Suicide Squad & Batman; animation	Movie	DVD	2014
6	Nice Guys, The	Gosling, Crowe	Movie	Theater	2016
7	Shallows, The	Lively, A Shark	Movie	Theater	2016
8	Sisters	Fey, Poehler	Movie	DVD	2015
9	10 Cloverfield Lane	Goodman,	Movie	Theater	2016
10	Captain America: Civil War	Evans, Downey, Mackie, Johannson	Movie	Theater	2016
11	Intern, The	Anne Hathaway, Robert De Niro	Movie	Theater	2015
12	Deadpool	Reynolds, Morena, Miller,	Movie	Theater	2016
13	Accountant, The	Affleck, Kendrick, Bana,	Movie	Theater	2016
14	La La Land	Stone, Gosling	Movie	Theater	2016
15	Doctor Strange	Cumberbatch, McAdams, Bratt, Swinton, Mikkelson	Movie	Theater	2016
16	Everybody Wants Some	Linklater, Jenner, etc…	Movie	Theater	2016
17	Star Trek: Beyond	Pine, Quinto, Urban, Pegg, Yelchin	Movie	Theater	2016
18	Suicide Squad	Robie, Smith, Leto	Movie	Theater	2016
19	Anomalisa	Noonan, Leigh	Movie	Theater	2015
20	Jason Bourne	Damon, Jones, Stiles,	Movie	Theater	2016
21	X-Men: Apocalypse	Lawrence, Fassbender, Jackman,	Movie	Theater	2016
22	Love & Friendship	Beckinsale, Savigney	Movie	Theater	2016
23	Magnificent Seven, The	Washington, Pratt, Hawke, Skarrsgard,	Movie	Theater	2016
24	Ghostbusters	Wiig, Jones, McKinnon, McCarthy, Hemsworth	Movie	Theater	2016
25	Sully	Tom Hanks, Eckhardt,  (Eastwood-director)	Movie	Theater	2016
26	Jackie	Natalie Portman	Movie	Theater	2016
27	Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find them	Redmayne, Waterston,	Movie	Theater	2016
28	Arrival	Adams, Renner,	Movie	Theater	2016
29	Batman Vs Superman	Affleck, Cavill, Godot,	Movie	Theater	2016
30	Mr. Blandings Builds A Dreamhouse	Cary Grant	Movie	Television	1948
31	Pride And Prejudice And Zombies	Lily James, Lena Headey	Movie	DVD	2015
32	Bad Moms	Kinis, Bell, Hahn	Movie	Theater	2016
33	Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates	Kendrick	Movie	Theater	2016
34	Joy	Lawrence, DeNiro, Cooper	Movie	Theater	2015
35	Last Vegas	Douglas, Freeman, DeNiro, Kline	Movie	Television	2014
36	Sylvia Scarlet	Katherine Hepburn, Cary Grant,	Movie	Television	1935
37	Zoolander 2	Stiller, Wilson,	Movie	Theater	2016
38	I Saw The Light	Tom Hiddleston	Movie	Theater	2016
39	Hail, Caeser	Clooney, Brolin, cowboy	Movie	Theater	2016
40	Goodbye World		Movie	DVD	2013
41	Barely Lethal		Movie	DVD	2015
42	Batman: The Killing Joke	Kevin Conway, Tara Strong	Movie	DVD	2016
43	Austenland	Russell,	Movie	DVD	2013
44	Now You See Me 2	Eisenberg, Caplan, Ruffalo	Movie	Theater	2016
45	Joe Dirt 2	David Spade, Brittany Daniels, Warburton	Movie	DVD	2015
46	Jack Reacher: Never Go Back	Cruise, Smulders,	Movie	Theater	2016
47	Maggie	Arnold Schwarzenegger	Movie	DVD	2015
48	Central Intelligence	Hart, Johnson	Movie	Theater	2016
49	Planet Of The Sharks	B-Movie on SYFY	Movie	Television	2016
50	Get a Job	Anna Kendrick	Movie	DVD	2012
51	Hot Pursuit	Witherspoon, Vergara	Movie	DVD	2015
52	Gods Of Egypt	Gerard Butler	Movie	Television	2015
53	Atomic Shark	B-Movie on SYFY	Movie	Television	2016
54	Anna Karenina	Knightley	Movie	DVD	2012
1	Museum: Walker Art Center		Museum	Museum	2016
1	Anything But Words	Banks & Steelz	Music	CD	2016
2	Hit N Run Phase 2	Prince	Music	CD	2016
3	BlackStar	David Bowie	Music	CD	2016
4	Seasick	Imperial Teen	Music	CD	1996
5	Radio 1: Established 1967	Various Artists	Music	CD	2007
6	Bill Haley & The Comets Greatest Hits	Bill Halet & The Comets	Music	Download	2016
7	Sounds Of The 80's	Various Artists	Music	CD	2006
8	Beat The Devil's Tattoo	Black Rebel Motorcycle Club	Music	CD	2010
9	Definitive Collection	Glen Campbell	Music	CD	2013
10	Complete Greatest Hits	Gordon Lightfoot	Music	CD	2002
11	Fashion Nugget	Cake	Music	CD	1996
12	Ghost On the Canvas	Glen Campbell	Music	CD	2014
13	Simply Kylie	Kylie Minogue	Music	CD	2016
14	Hot Wire	Kix	Music	CD	1991
15	Midnight Dynamite	Kix	Music	CD	1985
16	Suicide Pact	Jjamz (The singer from The Like)	Music	CD	2012
17	Kylie Christmas (Snow Queen Edition)	Kylie Minogue	Music	CD	2016
18	Hair, The TV, The Baby And The Band	Imperial Teen	Music	CD	2007
19	Amesty	Crystal Castles	Music	CD	2016
20	Comfort Eagle	Cake	Music	CD	2004 ?
21	Familia	Sophie Ellis-Bextor	Music	CD	2016
22	Hit N Run Phase 1	Prince	Music	CD	2015
23	Now That's What I Call Music: 56	Various Artists	Music	CD	2003
24	All The Hits: The Ultimate Collection	B.J. Thomas	Music	CD	2005
25	Beautiful Broken	Heart	Music	CD	2016
26	Good Times	Monkees	Music	CD	2016
27	Bagtown	Nu Shooz	Music	Download	2016
28	Head Carrier	Pixies	Music	CD	2016
29	Beast Of Dio	Dio	Music	CD	2000
30	Mistaken Identity Collection	Kim Carnes	Music	CD	1991
31	The Constant	I Blame Coco	Music	CD	2010
32	High Rise	Stone Temple Pilots	Music	CD	2013
33	Cult Of Ray	Frank Black	Music	Download	1995
34	Distortland	Dandy Warhols	Music	CD	2016
35	Super	Pet Shop Boys	Music	CD	2016
36	Show Business	Kix	Music	Download	1995
37	1776	1776	Music	Streaming	2011
38	Better Nature	Silversun Pickups	Music	CD	2015
39	This Machine	Dandy Warhols	Music	CD	2012
40	Hidden City	Cult, The	Music	CD	2016
41	Blind Spot (EP)	Lush	Music	Download	2016
42	NonStopErotik	Frank Black	Music	CD	2010
43	Regneration	Styx	Music	CD	2014
44	Pipes Of Peace	Paul McCartney	Music	CD	1983
45	Now That's What I Call Music: 70	Various Artists	Music	CD	2008
46	Fanatic	Heart	Music	CD	2012
47	God's Foot (Demos)	Juliana Hatfield	Music	CD	2004
48	Electric Warlock	Rob Zombie	Music	CD	2016
49	A Sunshine Christmas	KC & The Sunshine Band	Music	CD	2013
50	True	Solange	Music	CD	2013
51	Paper Planes	Anya Marina	Music	CD	2016
52	When Did We Do That?	Letters To Cleo	Music	CD	2008
53	Specter At The Feast	Black Rebel Motorcycle Club	Music	CD	2013
54	A Seat At The Table	Solange	Music	CD	2016
55	24K Magic	Bruno Mars	Music	CD	2016
56	Prism	Katy Perry	Music	CD	2015
57	This Is What The Truth Feels Like	Gwen Stefani	Music	CD	2016
58	Long Lost Suitcase	Tom Jones	Music	CD	2015
59	Head Full Of Dreams	Coldplay	Music	CD	2015
60	Carrying A Torch	Tom Jones	Music	CD	1991
61	The Information	Elliot Sumner	Music	CD	2016
62	Catch The Rainbow	Rainbow	Music	CD	1975
63	Darkness And Light	John Legend	Music	CD	2016
64	New Sheets	Possum Dixon	Music	CD	1998
65	P.D.A.	Hey Willpower	Music	CD	2007
66	Shine	Frida	Music	Download	1984
67	Strange Little Birds	Garbage	Music	CD	2016
68	Weezer (White Album)	Weezer	Music	CD	2016
69	Move Closer	Tom Jones	Music	CD	1989
70	Wild Things	Ladyhawke	Music	CD	2016
71	Sol Invictus	Faith No More	Music	CD	2015
72	Thank You For the Music: ABBA Tribute	Thank You For the Music	Music	CD	2012
73	Lexicon Of Love	ABC	Music	CD	2016
74	Getaway, The	Red Hot Chili Peppers	Music	CD	2016
75	A	Agnetha Faltskog	Music	CD	2013
76	Dandy Warhols Are Sound	Dandy Warhols	Music	CD	2009
77	So There	Ben Folds	Music	CD	2015
78	Gollum	Frank Black	Music	CD	2008
79	Blackbird Diaries	Dave Stewart	Music	CD	2011
80	Dutch Masters	Dandy Warhols	Music	CD	2015
1	Play: The Critic & The Real Inspector Hound		Play	Live	2015